Posts Tagged ‘BSG’

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Top 10 “Battlestar Galactica” spinoffs you’ll never see

April 22, 2009

In honour of the recent release of the pilot of the Battlestar Galactica prequel Caprica, we put our heads together (and a hollow knocking sound was heard throughout the region) and came up with a list of other possible spinoffs you’re not likely to see anytime soon:

10) CSI: New Caprica
Every episode: “The Cylon did it.”

9) Centurion Idol
“Your delivery of ‘by your command’ was soulless and mechanical!”

8 ) Survivor: Prehistoric Earth
“Okay, we’ve got four people left from the Saggitaron tribe and the Tauron tribe. To avoid elimination in this round, everyone will have to kill their own one ton short-faced bear. Since Bob over here won immunity in the last round, he gets the handgun with the last bullet in existence. The rest of you: a stick. Missin’ your nasty technology yet?”

7) The Pythian Prophecies Hour
“The Lords of Kobol have commanded that I raise 2 million cubits to build a new opera house. Send your donation and you will be saved, brothers and sisters!

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Quick thoughts on Caprica

April 22, 2009

WARNING: SPOILERS

I just finished watching the new pilot for the BSG spinoff/prequel Caprica this evening and, so far, it’s got my vote. Interesting characters and storylines with enough hints about the seeds of the Cylon war that viewers can already start speculating about how the show’s going to pan out (if it’s given enough time).

The story revolves around rich technology giant Daniel Graystone and lawyer Joseph Adama (father of Admiral William Adama). Both men lose their daughters (Adama loses his wife as well) when a boy terrorist sets off a bomb on a passenger train. Graystone, who’s been trying to create a successful military robot prototype but needs an AI to make it work, stumbles upon a secret of his daughter’s that could affect his life and his work, while Adama tries to raise his surviving son while struggling with obligations to his people and the mob as he tries to stay legit.

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Top 15 totally unexpected alternate endings for “Battlestar Galactica”

March 26, 2009

Ah, the post-mortem phase of a TV series. Everybody (us included) is weighing-in these days on BSG’s finale, offering their woulda/shoulda/coulda speculations about alternatives to the ending viewers were given. And some are pretty creative. We decided to take it into the realm of the absurd. Here are some of our suggestions for ways the final episode could have ended that would really have surprised viewers:

15) Starbuck turns out to be an angel, Baltar and Six are angels – kind of. And Apollo’s an angel. And Rosalin and Adama are angels. Yeah, yeah. Everyone’s an angel. Isn’t that what your preschool teacher told you?

14) A group of Colonial settlers comes over a rise to find several dozen Earthlings crouched around a mysterious black monolith, thoughtfully swinging the animal bones they’ve just learned can help them get meat.

13) Galactica jumps into the vicinity of the black hole ready for a fight, only to find Cavil’s already fallen victim to the recession and a force more powerful than a legion of centurions – mortgage bankers – has put a “foreclosure/repossessed” sign on the Cylon colony’s front gate.

12) The Fleet finds Earth – not during the early days of mankind, but during the era of the dinosaurs, which are too many and too dangerous to permit colonization… that is until Baltar looks out a porthole, spots a passing asteroid and says “Do you know, I think I have an idea…”

11) Things look grim for the Colonials as their marine boarding party seems overwhelmed by enemy centurions, when suddenly, lawyers for Warner Brothers appear armed with lawsuits ordering NBC to shut the Cylon colony down for looking too much like a Shadow vessel from Babylon 5.

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Top 5 things I wanted to see in “Battlestar Galactica”, but didn’t

March 18, 2009

Yes, I know, BSG is not technically over yet – there’s still the finale on Friday – but for all intents and purposes, it’s history. And while I think it’s one of the best shows on TV ever, regardless of genre, it wasn’t perfect. Here are the Top 5 Things I Wanted to See in BSG, But Didn’t:

5) An episode with survivors on New Caprica
With an evacuation as large, complex and sudden as the one on New Caprica when Galactica came to the rescue, there must have been people (either wounded, knocked-out, or just out in the woods picking mushrooms) who were left behind. Little Hera is proof of that. Sure the Cylons probably made a cursory sweep of the place afterward, but under the circumstances, given the massive success of the fleet’s getaway, I doubt they made much of an effort. Realistically, there would have been a few stranded there permanently. I thought it would have been interesting to have cut back there for a Robinson Crusoe-type of episode (similar to the episode finally shedding light on Starbuck’s fate in the old series). But then again, that would have dampened the pace of the series’ main plot and feeling of forward movement with everyone finally together for better or worse. Still it could have made for an interesting one-off special like “Razor”.

4) Centurion integration into the new rebel Cylon society

We’re only given a couple of brief hints about life aboard the rebel Cylon basestar with the newly self-aware Centurion models: the humanoids have to say please and thank-you to get the big toasters to do the menial work now, and at least one displayed receptivity to Baltar’s seditious sermonizing. Beyond that, we don’t see the Centurions much and have no idea how their integration with their former masters is going. Certainly it has a lot of bearing not only on the social harmony aboard the basestar, but seeing as how the basestar will be the protector of the Fleet, the degree to which the Centurions are getting along with the skin-jobs has a lot of impact on the potential safety of the entire fleet and the survival of humanity. If only the show had a little more time, this is a plot line that should have been explored.

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The top 10 doctors of SF

February 19, 2009

Not too long ago my family doctor announced that he’ll be retiring soon. After my initial twin reactions of “Good for him; he’s earned it” and “oh crap, now I’ve gotta find a new doctor!” (most docs with practices in this neck of the woods aren’t taking new patients – many people have to put up with the impersonal service at walk-in clinics), I got to thinking about physicians in general, and the roles they’ve had in SF. So harrysaxon and I put our heads together and came up with this list of our favourite doctors of the genre(s) in books, TV and film.

10) Tachyon – Wildcards, edited by George RR Martin
-nominated by bloginhood
Sure he had a hand in creating the wildcard virus that dealt humanity a bad hand, but this purple-eyed alien sawbones made it up to the people of his new home by setting up the Jokertown Clinic to help ease the suffering of those who survived the bug but were left with freakish disfigurements.

9) Martha Jones – Doctor Who
-nominated by bloginhood
Smart, tough, adaptable, easy on the eyes, and most importantly, able to recognize that pining after The Doctor won’t do her any good. Others may have theirs, but Martha’s my favourite among the Companions.

8 ) Tyler Dupree – Spin, by Robert Charles Wilson
-nominated by bloginhood
The world-changing events in Wilson’s brilliant novel are seen through the eyes of Dupree, but it’s not his exploits with a scalpel that are important. His bedside manner with an old friend proves to be more valuable in a story about relationships set against a backdrop where unseen forces of immense power have the Earth seemingly on the brink of disaster.

7) Clemens – Alien 3
-nominated by bloginhood
It’s pretty impressive when a supporting character is so compelling that he outshines Ripley in an Alien movie. Whether he’s trying to figure out what Sigourney Weaver’s character is hiding during an autopsy on Newt, standing up to the prison warden, or telling the story of how he lost is license and was sent to do time on a maximum security prison, Charles Dance’s performance is so absorbing that they pretty much had to kill him off so we’d pay more attention to the castaway who brought the big mean bug – that and because pretty much everybody becomes Alien chow by the end of the flick.

6) The Doctor – Star Trek: Voyager
-nominated by harrysaxon
During the long years of Voyager’s trek across the Delta Quadrant, this holographic healer did pretty much everything you can think of, from coming up with radical cures for strange alien diseases to taking a prototype ship into combat to writing a novel. Ultimately, he picked up the mantle from Next Generation’s Data of the Tin Man looking for a heart in his quest to be recognized as a sentient entity with equal rights among the crew.

5) Doc Cottle – Battlestar Galactica
-nominated by both
Sure we don’t see much of him, but when we do, every second counts and all other characters fade into the background. His crusty badgering of his patients is possibly more ferocious than Cylon bullets and is always entertaining.

4) Simon Tam – Firefly
-nominated by bloginhood
Most of the attention is focussed on his troubled little sister, but this fugitive physician is an integral part of Serenity’s crew, and springing River from the lab, he’s played an important part in exposing the government’s Miranda virus experiments and their consequences to the ‘Verse.

3) Abraham Van Helsing – Dracula, by Bram Stoker
-nominated by both
Doctor and ass-kicking vampire hunter. Without his fearlessness and expertise, Harker, Mina and the rest of their gang would have been lost and Dracula would have been gulping his way through London like a drunk in a wine cellar. Anthony Hopkins’ take on the character in Coppola’s cinematic take on the story was great. We shall not speak of Jackman’s Van Helsing flick.

2) Steven Franklin – Babylon 5
-nominated by bloginhood
Franklin’s expertise in med-lab have made him one of the finest doctors in the Earth Alliance (and possibly the Interstellar Alliance), add spy and revolutionary and you’ve got a pretty impressive resume. But what ranks B5’s chief of medical staff so high on the list is how well-written his character is. Sure, it took a season or two to find his pace, but we see eventually saw different aspects to his personality beyond that of the earnest doctor, and his is a personality that changes over the course of the series in believable ways. For someone who was so fiery in many early episodes, it was interesting to see him leave the station quietly, humbly and alone at the end when he took the new job on Earth.

1) Leonard “Bones” McCoy – Star Trek
-nominated by bloginhood
Come on! Who else could top a list like this? Bones is probably the best-known among his profession in SF, if only for his often-lampooned insistance that he’s a doctor, not a – (insert the profession/trade/craft/general labour category of your choice).

Honourable Mentions:

  • Julian Bashir – Star Trek: Deep Space 9
  • Beverley Crusher – Star Trek: The Next Generation
  • Ash – Alien (okay, he was the ship’s science officer, but he doubled as medic when he wasn’t scheming about how to kill the crew)
  • Victor Frankenstein (we weren’t sure whether it was more appropriate to classify him as a natural scientist using medical/surgical techniques to assemble his creation)
  • Henry Jekyll (again, another uncertain one – doctor or chemist?)

Your Nominations:

  • Janet Fraiser – Stargate: SG-1
  • Dana Scully – X-Files
  • 2-1B – the Star Wars franchise
  • FX series – the Star Wars franchise
  • Moira MacTaggart – X-Men
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Which SF classics need to be remade?

February 11, 2009

This news about the “Day of the Triffids” remake has got me thinking about the issue of remakes in general. There seems to be a lot of the everything-old-is-new-again bug going around. Recently, Hollywood inflicted a cinematic shitfest of “The Day the Earth Stood Still” against audiences. Not too long ago “Journey to the Center of the Earth” was redone (in 3D), and before that, “I am Legend”, and, of course, “Lord of the Rings” commanded the box office at the beginning of the decade, and the list goes on. Meanwhile, a re-imagined “Star Trek” is about to hit the screens, a new take on “20,000 Leagues Under the Sea” is in development, the Harry Potter series continues, there’s talk of something based on “Rendezvous with Rama”, and so on and so forth – and that’s not even including the recent rash of inspired-by’s/related-to’s cropping up, like Straczynski’s follow-up to “Forbidden Planet” or the prequel to “The Thing”.

Putting aside the question of whether Hollywood ought to be doing remakes or adaptations in the first place rather than something original, or whether it’s capable of doing a remake without screwing it up (sometimes, like in the case of BSG or Jackson’s “King Kong” it does work out), I got to wondering which SF classics (from movies, TV or books) need to be remade or adapted for the screen?

The first that comes to mind is HG Wells’ “The Time Machine”. More than just a great adventure story, it raises questions about the consequences of social/labour class divisions as well as sexual politics. The novel has been adapted several times, with George Pal’s 1960 version being the best, in my opinion. But I think it’s time for a newer version, using the best of modern photo-real special effects – the kind of remake that the 2002 version should have been, that wasn’t because Simon Wells and his gang messed up the story.

I think it’s also time for Ray Bradbury’s “The Martian Chronicles” to get another adaptation. The 1980 mini-series was okay, but again, with modern visual effects I think an updated version would look so much better. To do it justice though, they’d have to tackle it again as a TV mini-series or, even better, a full season production.

So what classic SF book, movie or TV series do you think needs a remake?

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Gaeta’s Galactica: Where ideals go to die

February 3, 2009

Warning: Spoilers

It’s hard to hate BSG’s Felix Gaeta, even though he’s become a treasonous little dink. He is, after all, a victim of his own idealism.

His biggest crime (aside from the whole mutiny thing, and all the deaths, injuries and various other possible associated assaults that go with it) is repeating the same mistake over and over – failing to consider the consequences of what happens when he pursues his ideals too blindly. Three times now his inability to think things through, see the situation for all of its multi-faceted greyness and understand how utterly necessary compromise is for human survival, has resulted in this normally competant young officer backing the wrong horse, and by horse I mean nightmare. What’s worse is that these absolute-driven decisions have resulted in escallating degrees of chaos and death.

We saw the first glimmerings of this in season one (and this is merely to set the stage, it’s not one of his big three tragic mistakes) in “Final Cut” where he confides that all he ever wanted was to be an officer aboard a battlestar, and now that he’s there, he doesn’t know what he wants anymore. The first indication of the pattern where he pursues the ideal without thinking it through – without asking what happens on the other side.

But the first true mistake comes during the Rosalin-Baltar election,where Gaeta uncovers the evidence of ballot tampering by Rosalin’s team. Rather than sit down and think things through, rather even than becomming an informed cynic and washing his hands of the entire dirty mess of politics, Gaeta goes rushing to the side of his hero, Baltar, and winds up propping-up his clumsy administration during the year on New Caprica before the Cylons came, and continuing to act as yes-man under the new Cylon regime. On this occasion, he at least had some degree of redemption by feeding information to the resistance. But it doesn’t take away from the fact that he’s exercised poor judgement and is living with the consequences.

During the Cylon occupation (as recently revealed to us in the 2008/2009 webisodes), Gaeta made his second fatal decision. Desperate to do something to get some people away from  Cylon persecution, he forged an alliance with an 8, one based not only on subterfuge but on romance. The problem with being wrapped up in his romantic ideal of playing a role in a kind of Schindler’s List scenario, feeding names to the 8 to get the people to safety, was that he didn’t consider she could be playing him, and didn’t bother to follow-up to see if all of them actually escaped. His feelings for the 8 – again rooted in the ideal – certainly helped blind him to what was going on. As bad as propping-up Baltar’s presidency was, this was worse – Felix Gaeta’s own actions led to the deaths of his fellow Colonial humans.

Which brings things to the current blunder – the mutiny. Fuelled by anger over the alliance wth the rebel Cylons; fear of Cylon technology aboard Colonial ships; disappointment at the discovery of a dead “Earth” (I’m still not convinced this is the real Earth); dispair at the thought of a hopeless future of wandering the stars being hounded by Cavil’s Cylons; and depression, frustration, physical pain and possibly madness resulting from the loss of his leg and the circumstances that led to it, Gaeta has now decided that Admiral Adama is no longer fit to command Galactica or lead the Fleet. Assembling a force of discontented crew and civilians (several malcontents among them), he’s sprung Tom Zerek from the brig and led a bloody insurrection. And this time, it’s not just a few colonists on New Caprica who have died as a result of Cylon orders. No, this time his screw-up has risen to a whole new level where Gaeta’s issuing the orders about who to fight and where. In an immediate sense, this has led to dozens, perhaps hundreds of his own shipmates, along with many civilians aboard the battlestar, getting wounded or killed. This is fighting that has seen people like the new deck chief who are just doing their jobs die, as well as idealists like the young crewman who took a bullet to save Adama, and who knows how many others just caught in the middle. If Gaeta had thought it through, he would have been forced to ask himself about how wrong this is. He would have been forced to ask himself how could it possibly be beneficial to deplete and weaken humanity’s already small defence force with infighting. Moreover, this is a move that puts the power of the Fleet into Zerek’s hands and jeopardizes humanity’s existence. Never mind the long-term possibility of Zerek’s tyranny, let’s look at the likelihood of honking-off the rebel Cylons who are sitting on a load of nukes in their basestar at point blank range, who might not take kindly to their alliance being broken or the lives of their Final Four being threatened. That couldn’t lead to disaster, could it? The fighting aboard Galactica has ultimately landed Gaeta in the company of people his ideals normally wouldn’t allow him to associate with. He’s now giving orders to Specialist Gage(who’s taken Gaeta’s station in the CIC), a rapist, torturer and thug of Lieutenant Thorn’s aboard the Pegasus. He’s now taking orders from Tom Zerick, Vice-President of the Colonies, but also a wannabe Stalinist dictator, convicted terrorist and murderer, instigator of riot and assault aboard a prison ship where he was prepared to allow a fellow inmate to rape Cally, and architect of an assasination plot during his election race against Rosalin. And Gaeta is directly responsible for all of this – no excuses. It’s still a case of Gaeta jumping at his ideals without stopping to consider the consequences or other alternatives.

And so Gaeta’s almost a Shakespearean character, eschewing temperance for absolute ideals and righteous indignation and consequently landing on the bad side of fortune.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a total cynic. There are other idealists aboard Galactica/the Fleet who thrive. Lee Adama is one of them. He always strives to make things the way they ought to be, and yet he sees the situations, and the other players, for what they are and knows compromise is sometimes the only way to advance, or to prevent a total loss.

Gaeta’s still basically a good kid, but it’s his inability to be like Apollo and see the world for its greyness and think things through, his inability to learn from mistakes that couldn’t be any clearer as lessons, that has led to tragedy. He’s not worthy of hatred. That’s reserved for real villains like Zerek or Cavil. Gaeta, though worthy of punishment, is to be pitied.